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Things I have learned: How to stay memorable

1/10/2020

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As the Director of my own company, I rely on word of mouth to ensure I am always bringing in new business. Reputation is everything, and something I work hard at. However, I am aware as anyone else just how busy our lives are - we are overwhelmed by work and fast moving social media feeds and it is easy to slip off the radar.  So I know just how important it is to keep in touch with your contacts and stay 'front of mind'. I have my own little ways of doing this , such as sending 'Happy New Year' cards to my contacts (a little different from sending the usual Christmas card), but I was really interested to hear some tips from the former editorial director of Twitter, Karen Wickre on how to nurture these contacts throughout the year:

​Take 10 minutes a day to craft casual hellos — it goes a long way.
According to Karen Wickre, tending your network doesn’t take more than 10 minutes a day. The key to making meaningful connections, she argues, isn’t going to a marathon of cocktail hours. It’s staying in “loose touch” — what she defines as “the care and feeding of your networks over time.”
As the former editorial director of Twitter, Wickre is both incredibly well-connected and a self-described introvert. She even wrote a book for her fellow quiet, limelight-avoidant observers. In Taking the Work Out of Networking: An Introvert’s Guide to Making Connections That Count, Wickre shares a 10-minute trick for maintaining loose touch, and five FYIs you can send keep your relationships thriving.
Here she is in her own words:

No one likes to feel used repeatedly, especially when it’s one-sided. The best connections you can make are those where you have mutuality: sometimes one of you needs something, and sometimes neither of you does, and you continue to give your time and attention either way.

This is my guiding principle for no-pressure networking: Nurture it before you need it.
Start by spending 10 minutes a day building your loose-touch habit. That’s a small amount of effort for what is potentially a lot of payoff, in good feelings if not in immediate outcomes. Whether you’re the giver or the receiver in need, you’ll get a sense of satisfaction either way. Here’s how I fit it into my day:
  • Make it a morning warm-up. My morning ritual of checking email and my news feeds is a way to limber up for the workday. As I scan the headlines, I’ll share a story or two that I know are of interest to people I haven’t been in touch with along with a short note: “This made me think of you. What’s your take? And how are you?”
  • Keep a running to-do list. Part of staying in loose touch is simply following up on encounters you’ve had. After your conversation or meeting, think about what you wanted to pass along, and who came to mind that you’d like to reach out to. Add them to your list and get the satisfaction of crossing that task off later.
  • Close out the day with gratitude. Send out a couple of “thinking of you” notes to people you’ve enjoyed meeting or would like to catch up with, or to even start a new conversation with someone you’ve just met. It’s a nice way to plant the seed of connection that might yield a response as soon as the next day.
Use these five FYIs to say hi.
The nice thing about a “Just FYI” message is that there’s no real obligation involved on either side, and you are top of mind for a moment with the recipient (which helps solidify your ongoing relationship).
Apart from the link or attachment, your message is essentially along these lines: this confirms what we talked about; I wonder what your reaction is; reading this reminds me of you. Here are five types of ‘Just FYI’ notes to add to your rotation:
  • Send a relevant article to someone who interviewed you for a job you didn’t get. Even though it didn’t work out, you liked that person you met, and want to stay in touch. Show that you’re a good sport and still attentive to the company and industry. (Just don’t revisit the job interview.)
  • Say hello to someone you met at a conference last year with the just-published agenda for this year’s event, asking if they’ll be attending.
  • Share interesting news about your old company with a former colleague. Former co-workers are sometimes the best weak ties — you may not have known them well, but there’s a feeling of kinship. A simple note asking what they’re up to along with a story can keep the connection going, or even strengthen it.
  • Show you’re paying attention to your weak ties by sending them items (news, event, commentary) related to their interests. For someone you don’t know well, this will give a moment of delight and appreciation. What you send is based on what you know: are they presenting at a conference, doing research, passionate about a project, focused on an emerging trend?
  • Reinforce a connection you just made by following up with relevant information. If you just met someone and talked about mobile phone usage, send the news story you spotted on this with a brief note (“This made me think of our conversation”).
Here’s an example of a no-obligation “Just FYI” note I sent recently to a friendly professional contact in the field of autonomous cars. I thought of him after seeing a tweet about an upcoming workshop on that topic.
Subject: Do you know about this conference? (The subject line should tease the information you’re sending instead of being a generic “hi”.)
Hi Jimmie, I hope you’re faring well in these fun times. Just ran across this [link] and thought of you.
Happy Monday,
Karen
Even this short note accomplishes quite a lot:
  • “Fun times” is a reference to the surge of news about autonomous cars, which is sometimes wacky, negative, or inaccurate. This mention conveys a bit of sympathy about what Jimmie deals with.
  • You don’t have to explain a lot if you include an informative link. In this case, it was the home page for an upcoming workshop for policymakers working on issues surrounding self-driving vehicles. Note that it was the site for the event itself, not a news story about the event — the former is more useful and direct.
  • Even the closing line, “Happy Monday,” says “I’m not looking for anything from you. Do what you like with this information.”
Read more of Karen’s highly tactical advice on how to make connections that count, from a Silicon Valley veteran and introvert.

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    Author

    Denise Yeats is an events director, communications consultant, endurance athlete and avid adventurer. 
    Denise is a highly sought after fundraising consultant who has raised millions for non profits through creative, high profile, elite events.  
    She has many years experience managing teams in highly pressurised 
    environments and is passionate about people development. 
    ​Denise is the architect of unique, award winning challenge events gaining national recognition. She embodies a 'can do' attitude, and as well as setting herself personal challenges, she delights in helping others to reach their potential.

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  • About
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